email from nishant govindan.
| Cigarette: A Pinch of tobacco rolled in a paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other. |
| Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test. |
| Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master. |
| Divorce: Future Tense of marriage. |
| Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either". |
| Conference: The conclusion of one man multiplied by the number of present. |
| Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece. |
| Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power.. |
| Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage. |
| Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on. |
| Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before. |
| Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read. |
| Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight. |
| Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life. |
| Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth. |
| Etc.: A sign to make other believe that you know more than you actually do. |
| Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together. |
| Experience: The name men give to their mistakes. |
| Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions. |
| Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken when dead. |
| Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip. |
| Opportunist: A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally falls into a river. |
| Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet". |
| Pessimist: A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO. Instead of the first letter word. |
| Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich, |
| Father: A banker provided by nature. |
| Criminal: A guy no different from the rest... except he got caught. |
| Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early. |
| Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after. |
| Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills. |
| Computer Engineer: One who gets paid for reading such mails. |
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